


Helmets, And Staying On

by KaidaShade



Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Death Scars, Exo Anatomy (Destiny), M/M, Oral Sex, Riding, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:35:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27041353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaidaShade/pseuds/KaidaShade
Summary: Shaxx’s face is one of the greatest mysteries of the City.  A chance glimpse catches Saint’s attention, and his reaction catches Shaxx's in return.Perhaps, Shaxx has more secrets to show him.
Relationships: Saint-14/Shaxx (Destiny)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 53





	Helmets, And Staying On

**Author's Note:**

> Y'all can blame my lovely friends in the smut server for this bad boy. Sometimes you just have to write two big buff dudes going at it... lovingly.

The Captain had come out of nowhere. One moment, Shaxx had been between a gaggle of fleeing civilians and a pair of Vandals determined to menace them, and the next there had been a flash of blue, the sweet-chemical scent of Ether in the air and the sudden, sharp crack of a blade slamming down on the side of his helmet. It sent him reeling, stepping back just enough to avoid a second strike from the other side that would have decapitated him. The blade still managed to score across his throat, gouging a line into the armour but missing anything vital. His reaction was pure instinct, a thunderous surge of Arc coursing through him and exploding outwards as he slammed his fists into the ground, vaporising the Vandals and staggering the Captain with the force of the explosion. He lurched forward, taking it in the chest with his shoulder. He felt its chitinous exoskeleton crack- or at least, he thought that was what had cracked- but as the Captain went flying backwards to land in a crumpled, smoking heap on the ground his senses returned to him and he realised that the crack had been much closer than that.   
  
He staggered forward a few steps, shaking his head, and several pieces of white-enamelled metal fell away from his face. Something in his jaw was making an unpleasant grinding noise and he put his hand up to it, realizing in horror that his fingers were touching bare skin, bare scar tissue and, further up, the empty socket where presumably his eye had been prior to his first death. He barely had any time to contemplate the old injury though, and the distraction cost him dearly as a shot from a Fallen shock rifle hit him square in the back and sent him sprawling. Pain shot through his face as he hit the ground, enough to knock the breath out of him even if his armour had saved him from a hole through the chest, and all he could do for a moment was groan and try to push himself onto his back as he heard the awful, chittering chuckle of the second Captain and its heavy footsteps advancing on him.   
  
He didn’t have time. It was going to skewer him. 

The blow never came. A clang from above him, a rush of air and a flash of purple Voidlight, a screech and hiss and the slump of a body, and a gauntleted hand came into his view. “Shaxx, my friend, this is no time for a nap.” The cheerful, metallic voice of Saint-14 was unmistakable, but even still Shaxx hesitated to take the assistance. He pushed himself up, careful to keep the cracked side of the helmet turned away from the smaller Titan. His Ghost materialised up against the side of his body and he felt her Light suffuse him, taking the edge off the pain in his back and the dizziness, but doing absolutely nothing about the ache in his jaw.

“Quite. Go, Saint, your City needs you.” He remarked, hefting his rifle and trying to keep his tone light, jovial. The blank plate of Saint’s helmet was unreadable, but there was a tilt to his head that Shaxx didn’t dare look at long enough to examine, not when there were still enemies to be fought.

The rest of the battle was a blur of pain and half-caught glimpses. His helmet’s HUD was shattered, and it had been a long time since he’d had to compensate for his lack of vision with only his wits and his Ghost- when she could risk manifesting- to help him. He was exhausted when the comms chatter finally reported their victory, and rather than try to return to the fold for a debrief he found himself a quiet corner of an empty building to sit and rest. Just for a moment, he told himself. He could just close his eye for a moment and then go back. His Ghost assured him that she would watch over him for a while.

He was woken by approaching footsteps, looked up sharply in time to see Saint stop a few feet from him and only just in time to avoid levelling his rifle at him. “Easy, I am not here to harm you Shaxx.” Saint assured him, his hands up and empty and his voice low. When Shaxx nodded and set the gun back in his lap he came closer and sat down on his good side, apparently unperturbed, “You were the only Titan who did not report in. I was... concerned, after you were injured earlier.” 

His expression was inscrutable, but Shaxx could almost feel him staring at the mess that was the exposed side of his face. “Nothing that Titania couldn’t fix.” He said, glancing at his Ghost as she bobbed into view.   
“So it would seem. Ghosts are wonderful beings, are they not? Thanks to them, we are immortal, our bodies unbreakable and able to recover from just about anything.” Saint remarked, unclasping his helmet and taking it off to rest in his lap. His eyes glowed purple in the dark, highlighting the strange metallic angles of his face. Shaxx had never been particularly perturbed by Exos, found them fascinating even, but there was something to Saint’s gaze as he looked up at him that made it hard to meet, like he saw too much, “But our minds. Well, that is a different story. Does this trouble you so?” His fingers clinked against his cheek, just below his eye, and Shaxx turned his head to hide it as he considered his answer.   
  
“It is… a vulnerability. One that could be taken advantage of.” He said slowly, “Titania has done what she can, but it seems the damage was done in my past life and there is no fixing it. I have adapted.”

Saint made a sympathetic sound, tapping the front of his armour. “I think many of us have similar wounds. Scars that do not heal, that we were resurrected with. I would show you mine but, well, undressing in public is still frowned upon even after such a battle.” He ended the sentence with a little chuckle, trying to lighten the mood Shaxx supposed. Despite himself, it almost helped. Saint’s attitude was infectious. “And I assure you, I have no intention of taking advantage, but it cannot be comfortable to wear a broken helmet…"

He had to admit to himself that Saint was right. There was a sharp edge digging into his cheek when he moved, but it still felt safer like this. Even if the worst of it was just out there, for Saint to see. That metallic face was as much of an open book as an Exo could be, and Shaxx found himself trusting it just enough to drop his head forward and unclasp his helmet, pulling it off and shaking out his sweat-soaked hair. 

He was a mess and he knew it even before he caught a glimpse of himself in the dirt-dulled surface of Saint’s chestplate; coated in dirt and grime and sweat and blood and the strange ichor of the Fallen, half of his face a horrifying gouge from brow to jawline as though some heavy blade had split it open to the bone, an eye missing and the socket blank and unsettling. He watched Saint carefully for a reaction, expecting disgust or staring and ready to be defensive, but that wasn’t what he got.

He hadn’t expected the soft whirr from within Saint’s chest, the way his violet eyes brightened slightly and the intricate iris within cycled further open, the brief flash of light inside his mouth that Shaxx didn’t know how to interpret. He tried anyway, shooting for levity and only missing by a little, so he thought. “I suppose you’ve already seen my good side. Is the rest so concerning?” 

Saint’s mouth flickered a little more and Shaxx realised he must be struggling for words.

“No, not at all. I did not realise you wore the helm to protect us all from succumbing to your handsomeness.” 

Shaxx had gotten so used to wearing the helmet that he didn’t try to school his glare at all, dark eye narrowing into a scowl levelled at Saint. “Not a funny joke, Saint.” He growled.   
“Who is joking?” The Exo cocked his head thoughtfully, and the next thing Shaxx knew there was a gauntleted hand cupping his jaw carefully, a metal mouth pressed gently to his. He froze. Saint paused. Shaxx didn’t push him away. 

He hadn’t expected an Exo to be so warm.   
  
Saint withdrew, making an odd clicking noise that he supposed was the equivalent of clearing his throat, and averted his gaze. “Well. I… should leave you be, perhaps. Here.” He held out his helmet, giving it a little wiggle when Shaxx didn’t take it right away. “A poor substitute perhaps, but it should get you home. I can fetch it later.” Shaxx had no choice but to take it, when given so insistently, and as soon as he did Saint pushed himself to his feet. Saint’s helmet was a little heavier than his, the inside less padded, and it almost felt wrong to put it on but the relief that came with having his face concealed seemed worth it.    
  
“Saint…” He called, and the Exo paused to look back at him with a raised brow ridge, “thank you. Truly.”

Saint’s smile was a lovely thing for all the strangeness of his face, and it took Shaxx by surprise. “Think nothing of it, my friend. Go and rest. I will see you soon no doubt.”

\------

Saint at least had the sense to comm ahead before turning up at Shaxx’s door several days later, for which he was grateful. Repairing his helmet when his Ghost was fresh hadn’t been difficult but between both of them being busy with their duties there hadn’t been time to return Saint’s, and besides, there had been something pleasing about watching the other Titan go bare-faced, his smile and his laugh infectious to everyone around him even moreso than usual.

Every time Shaxx saw him though, he had been unable to push the thought of those warm metal lips from his mind. He had never been so grateful for the blank visage of his helmet to hide the warmth that came to his cheeks, and Titania became quite exasperated with his thoughts when they kept him up at night, imagining where else Saint might kiss him. By the time the Exo actually appeared at his door, he had made up his mind. He had never been one to dither, to deny himself something that he wanted, after all. 

He peered through the peephole to check the coast was clear before opening the door. Saint stood beyond, and he saw his eyes widen in the moment before he pulled him inside, when he realised that Shaxx had no helmet.    
  
And no shirt, but that was less important.

“Shaxx- what?” Saint looked him up and down, perplexed, and Shaxx saw the way his eyes caught on his broad chest, the scars across his ribs beneath his pectoral muscles and the others that marred his skin elsewhere, less prominent. He watched as Saint forced his gaze up to his face, still confused. He made himself meet his eyes. 

“When you kissed me on the field, did you mean what you said?” He asked, “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.”

“I did. And I still think that you are handsome. If you… want my attention, you have it.” It probably wasn’t helping that Saint’s eye level was somewhere around Shaxx’s collarbone, and he seemed a little distracted.

“Unless you’re needed elsewhere. I’m offering… more than just a kiss.” His tongue wetted his lips briefly and he stepped in, waiting to see how Saint would respond. Maybe he’d come on too strong, should have been more subtle. Saint was probably the romantic type, would have wanted to be seduced instead of propositioned…   
“Nothing that cannot wait.” Saint cut off his train of thought, gauntleted hands resting on his waist as he leaned up to kiss him again. 

Kissing Exos was strange, the hard, sharp edges of Saint’s mouth catching at his lips as their tongues tangled, flesh and smooth silicone exploring each other, cautiously at first but any trace of shyness was soon whisked away under the Titanlike urge to plough ahead. There was nothing to be afraid of, Shaxx told himself, not when Saint had seen the worst and decided he liked what he saw and besides, it seemed even Exos kissed with their eyes closed. 

His armour had to go though. Shaxx’s hands trailed down his sides, seeking well-hidden fastenings with the expertise of someone well-accustomed to armour, and he felt as much as heard Saint chuckle. “Geppetto, a hand?” He asked, and Shaxx didn’t have time to let go before the armour dissolved away in motes of light under his hands, leaving only the warm metal of Saint’s plating. It seemed to thrum beneath his fingers, more alive than he had expected, and he couldn’t resist running his hands up his back and tracing the segments of his spine, the tiny vents. In turn he found Saint’s hand on his stomach, wandering over his abs and up to his pectorals, thumb tracing the scars while the other hand rested loosely in his hair. It surprised him how good it felt, metal fingers on his sensitive scalp, and he found himself leaning into it as his tongue explored the roof of Saint’s mouth. He tasted metallic, with a crisp undercurrent of winter air and sharp ozone, and it stole Shaxx’s breath away a little when he heard the Exo’s fans hitch and felt his hand tighten slightly in his hair. 

His lungs were burning when Saint finally pulled away, his fans running hard and his eyes flickering slightly. “Bed?” He suggested, glancing around Shaxx’s quarters before Shaxx nodded and backed up, tugging him with him by the undershirt until his calves hit the bedframe and he could pull him down with him. Saint was  _ heavy _ , crushing him down into the mattress for a moment before the Exo pushed himself up on his elbows, nuzzling under his jaw on his good side and whispering eager words in Old Russian that Shaxx understood only through his tone. He hand trailed to his pants, and Saint pushed himself up further and let his tongue peek between his mouth plates. “Let me take care of you, Shaxx. You do so much for this City of ours.” 

He could only nod breathlessly, tipping his head to watch once Saint kissed him once more and slid backwards to kneel between his thighs, hands firm on his hips as he nuzzled at his stomach, which flexed under his ministrations as Shaxx’s breath hitched. “Wait,” He said, and Saint met his eye with a curious tilt of his head, “You… might not be getting what you expect,” he warned. It seemed easier to warn him now than to deal with his reaction otherwise, and Saint’s huff of laughter was strangely reassuring. 

“Whatever I find, I will enjoy it,” He assured him, deft fingers tugging his pants down. He took a moment to look- to  _ admire _ , Shaxx almost dared to think- before sliding his hands up Shaxx’s thighs to spread them for a better view. If he hadn’t been wet before, Saint looking at him like  _ that _ , like something beautiful that he couldn’t wait to enjoy, would have been enough. “May I?”   
  
It only took a nod from Shaxx for Saint to lower his head, leaving a careful brush of his mouth against the inside of Shaxx’s thigh before he pressed his tongue between his folds, drawing a shaky gasp as the tip found his clit and honed in on it. Strong metal hands held his thighs apart as Saint buried his face between them, and Shaxx was reduced to moans and curling his fingers into the sheets as that clever tongue explored him, seeking every sensitive spot that would make him squirm. Saint gave head exactly how he did everything else; with great enthusiasm, and Shaxx could feel the heat coming off of him as his fans whirred, blowing hot air against his legs where they rested against Saint’s torso. He felt every shift of the heavy body between his legs, was sure for a moment he felt Saint trying to grind on the mattress, but then Saint distracted him with a brush of fingers and a question he didn’t fully hear, but suspected he understood anyway and nodded a reply.

Saint’s fingers were cooler than he expected compared to the rest of him, but they were thick and he seemed to know just how to move them to make Shaxx moan, especially combined with the drag of his tongue. He arched his back, shoulders digging into the mattress, and he thought he heard something rip distantly and, more immediately, Saint laugh.    
“Fuck… what…?”   
“Is it so good that you must destroy your own sheets?” Saint remarked, sounding far too composed for Shaxx’s liking. His deep voice reverberated through the metal of his faceplates, through his  _ tongue  _ which was  _ still _ working its magic, and Shaxx was unable to reply for a moment.   
“I’ll… I’ll fix it later, don’t stop, don’t you dare.”   
“I would not dream of it.”

Shaxx had never been a quiet man, and Saint seemed to revel in the way his voice rose as he continued, driving him closer and closer to the edge. He had to use all his willpower not to writhe under the Exo’s ministrations, and there was nothing left to keep him from shouting as he arched under his touch, vision whiting out for a moment under the onslaught of ecstasy. Saint worked him through it, lapping at his clit away even with Shaxx’s thighs threatening to crush his head, until Shaxx managed to reach down and push him away to stop him. “Enough, enough,” he gasped, and when Saint complied he found himself sprawled in his ruined sheets, breathing hard and a little dazed as he came down from the high.

He still had the wherewithal to look up when he felt the mattress shift under him, to find Saint gently extracting himself from between his thighs. He hadn’t managed to get the Exo’s pants off, but the bulge in the front of them was unmistakable. “And just where do you think you’re going?” he demanded, as though Saint was just another Titan and not the Vanguard and his superior. Surprisingly, Saint looked faintly embarrassed, as though he’d been caught sneaking away.    
“I… did not want to presume anything. I can take care of this myself, do not worry.”   
Shaxx’s eyes narrowed, and he sat up to grab Saint by the back of his head and drag him down into a kiss. “Like Hell you will. Come here.”

He had expected some resistance, but there was something like relief in the way Saint gave in to him. He let himself be dragged down onto the bed, even let Shaxx roll on top of him and at least make a spirited attempt at biting his neck, though his teeth didn’t make much headway on the metal and wires of his throat and trying made his jaw throb in protest. That wasn’t his goal though, even if the little burst of static from Saint’s voicebox was very pleasing to him. He sat up, straddling Saint’s hips, and took a moment just to look down at him, tilting his head for the best view. The Exo met his eye, and his gaze flickered as Shaxx shifted back to let his cock rub up against his ass. “Shaxx, please…”   
  
Saint shifted under him and he shifted back over his thighs so that he could free him from the confines of his pants. His cock was thick, with a silicone skin covered in interesting bumps and ridges. He couldn’t wait to find out what that felt like inside him, even if he was tempted to tease, to try to draw things out.

There could always be a next time for that, after all.

He gasped as he pulled himself up and forward and sank down on it, the sudden fullness almost too much. Shaxx had never been one to give up easily though, and he braced himself on Saint’s chest as the Exo’s hands slid to his waist, Saint’s head tipped back and his eyes closed in a moment of bliss. The thrumming of his fans had the same frantic energy as a heartbeat, though less of the rhythm, and Shaxx made himself wait even as his thighs trembled, taking the next few inches more slowly, more carefully. The stretch was wonderful, every bump a jolt of pleasure as it slid inside of him, and Saint’s hands on his waist almost seemed to ground him. 

His hips met Saint’s and the Exo pushed himself up, coming up to kiss him even though he had to stretch to do it. The change of angle made him gasp, and Saint’s tongue took its chance to slip into his mouth and tangle with his in a moment of breathless passion. Shaxx wrapped his arms around him, fingers curling at the base of his neck to hold on as he took his weight on his knees and moved, rocking up and back down in his lap. The kiss turned sloppy, Saint’s fingers gripping him a little harder as he sped up, finding himself driven on by the tight curl of heat in his stomach, the drag and additional stretch of each ridge. Where Saint had gotten mods like that he had no idea, but he was delighted by them as much as by the roar of his fans, the sudden chill and pull around his fingers as he started losing control of his Light. Shaxx leaned forward a little, tumbled him back onto the mattress and gave himself more room to move, chasing the messy kisses even when the clash of their mouths sent a stab of pain through his jaw. Worth it.   
  
He rode him hard, only breaking away from the fierce kiss when he had to turn his head to breathe, and he found himself panting into Saint’s shoulder, thighs and arms trembling, as they came apart together. Saint gasped his name in a rush of static and went tense under him, driving deep inside him and holding himself there for a moment as Shaxx shouted his pleasure and followed him over the edge before collapsing on top of him. 

It took him a while to realise that the shaking beneath his chest was Saint laughing softly. “Incredible. You are as fierce in the bedroom as you are on the battlefield, Shaxx.”   
“And you are just as eager.” Shaxx replied, once he had his breath back enough to speak. He shifted in Saint’s lap, letting his cock slide free as he rolled off to the side, wincing as his jaw was jostled. Saint seemed to notice, turning to look at him and very gently cupping his face.    
“Did I hurt you?” he asked, suddenly serious, and Shaxx couldn’t help but snort.    
“No, Light no, I’ve had far rougher trysts. That was… wonderful.” All the more so, he thought, that Saint could see the look on his face when he said it. No doubt he had a stupid little smile, like some besotted teenager despite being several centuries old. Saint just had that effect on people. The Exo’s eyes were bright and they creased at the corners in a smile, and he kissed him again as if on some impulse.   
“It was.” He said.   
  
Something undefined hung in the air for a moment, some uncertainty, until Saint reset his voicebox with a crackle. “I… suppose I should go. There is much still to be done. Vanguard duties…”   
“Of course.” Shaxx tried to hide his disappointment as he let Saint stand, though he propped himself on his elbows to appreciate the view as he went looking for his trousers. “I too should return to the Crucible. But… should you desire to drop by again, you don’t need the excuse of a helmet to do so.”

Saint glanced back, half bent over as he pulled his pants back on. For a moment Shaxx worried that he’d gone too far, but then Saint nodded. “I will keep that in mind, yes. I think… maybe I will find myself with free time tomorrow evening. It is pleasant to go to the plaza and feed the birds. Maybe you would join me there?”

It surprised him that Saint would ask him to do something so… mundane. But when was the last time someone had asked him on a… he supposed it  _ would _ be a date, wouldn’t it? He didn’t think anyone ever had. “I would enjoy that.” He said, the good side of his mouth quirking up into a smile that seemed to light up Saint’s entire face with delight.   
“Excellent! I will see you then!” He declared, suddenly filled with enthusiasm, and as Shaxx sat up properly he found Saint kissing him again, hard but brief, before he backed up to head for the door. He only paused for a moment when Gepetto chirped at him to let her put his armour back on, damnit, and then he was gone with a wave.

Shaxx sat for a moment before slowly pushing himself up to retrieve his own helmet. Funny, how such a thing had become so important to him. He considered, just for a moment, walking out without it to see what would happen, then immediately dismissed the notion. Not today.

For now, his face would be for Saint’s eyes only.    
  



End file.
